5 Days of Making Time for Mom – Time for Friendship
Thanks for joining me today for my 5 Days of Making Time for Mom series. This week we’re looking at different ways to make time for yourself so that you can avoid burnout. Yesterday I talked about how to make time to read. Today we’re talking about making time for friendships.
Okay. So the picture above looks nothing like me. I never really get "dolled" up to go hang out with moms. When I do find time for friends, the reality is more like this:
The idea that we have to look beautiful and do amazing things to get together really can frustrate making time for friends. It wasn't always like this.
Socialization Pre-Industrial Revolution
Wait a minute...we were talking about mom's night out. How did you get to the Industrial Revolution?
One of my favorite books from my past decade of reading is Nancy Pearcy's Total Truth. She describes the severing of public and private life which has created social isolation for women in a way that hasn't been experienced ever before in history.
Pearcy explains that households before the Industrial Revolution were unified, centers of work in which the entire family participated. Clients would come and go all day, interacting with the whole family running the family business. Dads were directly involved in the raising of children. Sounds like a different world, doesn't it?
In this time, a woman's need for social interaction was met by the family business. I've found that again recently as my husband has brought his music business to life in our home. On a daily basis, I have women sitting around my table engaging in soul nourishing conversations. I love it!
Not many of you will have a similar situation as mine, so you'll have to be intentional to get it done. Is it worth it? Absolutely.
The Value of Having Friends
When I first got married, I had this naive notion that I would never be lonely again. Sadly, I missed the friendships I had enjoyed with my college roommates. While my husband was wonderful, he was a different kind of friendship.
It takes a lot for a man to think like a woman. With a couple of sentences, you can communicate more to a girl friend than you can in hours of discussion with your husband. They have compassion because they're women who have shared experiences from being a woman.
My friends inspire me. They challenge me to think deeper, live better, and love sweeter. I can learn and grow from those around me who continually sharpen me. When I isolate myself, I find that everything I do is pretty amazing. I can quickly get full of self-righteousness. My friends help me see things from different perspectives.
When crisis hits, it is so wonderful to be surrounded by friends. They will be the greatest comforts to you. They'll bring you meals, cry with you, sit with you, and love on you. Crisis will expose true friends. I've experienced both sides of this. When my family experienced a crisis a couple of years ago, all of my "friends" scattered. It was a very difficult time for me to process pain without the comfort of friends. Recently, when my sister passed away, I experienced the opposite end of the spectrum. My friends rallied in support and love.
God has created us with a need for togetherness. Even though relationships can get messy, they're absolutely worth it.
When to Fit Time for Friends in Your Schedule
Relationships take time to cultivate. There's no way around that. Here are some creative ways to fit friends in your week:
- Coordinate a Weekly Park Meet-up. If you need friends, the odds are that someone else needs it too. Having a weekly plan for hanging out makes it that much easier to stay consistent.
- Coffee Break. Invite a friend for coffee one evening. Decaf goes well with conversation!
- Book Club. Start a book club. Maybe you're only meeting once every month, or even every other month, but you can chat about the book as you're reading it.
How do you make time for friends?
Other posts in this series:
This post is part of a great linkup and hopscotch with iHomeschoolNetwork.